Riot has revealed why its new anti-cheat system for Valorant runs all the time on users’ PCs, even when the game is not being played. As part of a currently 1,700 comment-long Reddit thread. You probably have seen a few of the 'You cheated the not only the game, but yourself' memes by now. Whether you're confused by them, curious, or even if you just don't give a crap, here's how it started. An editor for PC Gamer wrote an article about how he beat Sekiro's final boss with cheats,.
Most of us have been, or will go, through a breakup (or, you know, a few) in our lives. None of them are especially fun, but there is something exquisitely painful about having your relationship implode because a partner cheated. The confusion, the pain, and — let’s be honest — the anger in this situation can be really intense. None of this is made any easier when you're faced with actually having to get over someone who cheated and move on for good, which can feel like it’s even more impossible.
Here’s the silver lining: If it feels like moving on from a cheating partner is harder than the other breakups and heartbreaks you’ve endured, it's definitely not just you. “It’s really challenging to move forward when you’ve been cheated on,” life coach Nina Rubin confirms to Elite Daily. But why is it so much more difficult? It turns out that not all forms of heartbreak are the same, and the effects of infidelity can last much longer. Here's what the experts have to say on why the pain of cheating lingers, plus how to move forward and put that hurt in the rearview mirror.
When a relationship ends due to a partner's infidelity, there is another layer of betrayal, and that, Rubin explains, is what destroys the faith you had in them. “Physical and emotional affairs cut the main artery of a relationship: Trust. When you’ve been cheated on, you can no longer trust your partner,” and that, she explains, can be incredibly painful.
“Affairs bring with them extremely complex emotions and thoughts of anger, hurt, shame, embarrassment, self-doubt, humiliation, confusion, and fear,” explains Dr. Gary Brown, a prominent couples' therapist in Los Angeles. But it's not just the pain that makes moving on from a partner who cheats difficult. There are also feelings of anger to heal from, as Cherlyn Chong, a dating and breakup recovery coach for professional women, tells Elite Daily. “It hurts to know that your ex has broken their promises to you and wasted your time and energy,” she explains.
Perhaps the most insidious part of breaking up with someone who was unfaithful is the way that their betrayal can undermine your self confidence. Chong warns against falling into the trap of comparing yourself to the person your SO cheated with. “Not only do you have the loss of the relationship to get over, you also have the shame of feeling replaced by someone ‘better.’ You're constantly wondering if they were better-looking, taller, funnier or even better at sex than you,” says Chong. Not only will these kinds of comparisons increase your own pain, but they aren’t even the reality of the situation, Chong explains. “It's never because you weren't good enough,” says Chong. “Nor was it something you did that caused them to cheat. Cheating is their decision, and their decision alone. Cheating is multifaceted, and sometimes the reason for cheating can be deeper and more complex.”
Understanding why getting over someone who cheated is so difficult is one thing, but knowing how to actually do it is another. The first step is to make a conscious decision to move forward, says Chong. “If you have determined that the relationship is broken beyond repair, the most important thing is to simply decide that you will move on,” she explains. That also means sticking to this decision even if the cheating partner decides they want to keep trying. “If the person has broken up with you due to the other person, you must 'reject the rejector',' Chong says. 'If you have broken up with the person, you must decide that you will not accept that person back, because they have broken your trust and that can never be replaced again.” By staying firm in your choice, Chong says you can actually speed up the healing process. “Set a goal, figure out how you will get there, and then push yourself to get there. Take time to grieve, but don't stay there too long,” she advises.
How long is too long to grieve a breakup? 'It takes as long as it takes,” says Rubin, although she adds that the time you take needs to be constructive. “The best thing you can do for yourself is process the pain and learn more about your triggers. Keep holding your head high.” It's also important to note that, as you continue to heal, the feelings of betrayal left by cheating can create lasting emotional scars. “You may have triggers in your next relationship,” says Rubin. “This is normal. If you start feeling anxious or paranoid that your partner is going to cheat on you, this is a cue to get help and talk to them about your concerns.”
While there is no way to entirely avoid the pain that follows infidelity, the most important thing to remember is that healing is possible. “You can move forward. You can have a great life post-infidelity,” assures Dr. Brown. So hang in there and make your focus about self-care and self-love. You've got this.
Content warning: Harassment, threats.
I’ve been writing online for many years. My initial focus primarily centred on issues of ethics, since it was what I studied and taught at the time. It gave me an excuse to tackles issues I found interesting, while improving my writing ability. The themes I chose were considered “controversial” outside the semi Ivory Tower I operated in, but they generated discussions with students and peers, resulting in lively conversations and thoughtful take aways. Capital punishment, God, drugs, sex work, torture – these and more were all part of the conversations. I wrote and put my name under many of these and received furious replies — but only infrequently, and, even then, primarily from religious readers who were concerned for my immortal soul.
I then started writing about games and, since having a tiny bit of success from a few articles, I’ve become a central target of forums, reddit threads, and other dark tunnels running through the internet. Even my favourite readers do not care for me as much as online stalkers who, despite being blocked, still keep tabs, run to their creepy friends, to rat on what I said about a video game.
If you’re not digitally stalked, your swarmed, with anime avatars conveying horrific levels of anger and animosity, who require you to be silent and to take the punishment; or who, when you respond, engage in bad faith discussions about their alleged oppression or you faking or you lying or you being sensitive. (I’m a cishet man so I don’t receive anything comparable to those who do not identify as such; the focus, however, does tend to be on my race and threats to my “terrorist” self and family and what have you.) Conflict vietnam game cheats.
The lesson I learned is: You are a perfect target because you can never be the perfect victim. Nothing you do or say to those attacking will ever be “good” enough to get them to stop because:
1. They aren’t seeking an answer, they’re seeking a bullseye and bullseyes are meant to be silent and still.
2. Even if they did, each one hates you for different reasons, meaning satisfying one would only anger another.
When I was in the firing line, no matter how many were expressing support, I felt isolated. People, even supporters, were having conversations around you.
This is what I was reminded of recently when this Tweet went viral for how ridiculous it was.
You cheated not only the game, but yourself.
You didn't grow.
You didn't improve.
You took a shortcut and gained nothing.
You experienced a hollow victory.
Nothing was risked and nothing was gained.
It's sad that you don't know the difference. https://t.co/upkhLSNQNO
— Fetusberry 「Ass Bastard」 Crunch (@Fetusberry) April 6, 2019
This ridiculous statement and its incredibly serious but equally ridiculous follow-ups, all concern… a video game.
Yet, they also are targeting PC Gamer writer, James Davenport. As evidence, you need only look at the responses to the original PC Gamer Tweet (CW! I do not advise it, for your mental health).
I beat Sekiro's final boss with cheats and I feel fine https://t.co/Fj4i8d6sUbpic.twitter.com/N38RL5zxZO
— PC Gamer (@pcgamer) April 5, 2019
People like the original ridiculous poster whose Tweet went viral are not operating in isolation. If you see an article get that kind of vitriol, you can imagine the kind you don’t see: emails, DM’s, etc, that the author and colleagues have to deal with it.
Bullseyes must be silent and take it.
But we, who care, shouldn’t let that be the case. There might be an argument to be had that showing how ridiculous this original Tweet was helps to combat the normalisation of it. Yet, that still lends itself to promoting someone’s harassment above their work. This was confirmed by another PC Gamer staffer.
Every round-up that ends with 'teehee, what's it like for this guy to get meme'd on!?' could have instead thought about the author who was actually dealing with the bullshit, instead of meme dude who also tweeted 'They were paid for the review they wrote'
— Wes Fenlon (@wesleyfenlon) April 10, 2019
We can and must do better than this. I’m not saying don’t laugh at the ridiculous, angry people, who treat video games like it’s their life – but don’t let that stop you considering and prioritising the well-being of targets of these angry gamers’ harassment, the kind of awfulness targets have to go through, all in this weird landscape they’re just trying to make a decent living out of. I don’t blame anyone for laughing at this – hell, I laughed at the copypasta because I’d rather focus on laughter than harassment (since I was being targeted, too, recently). But again, we can do better.
Ps3 cheats for ps1 games. In short: I’d rather more people read the words of Mr Fenton than one of his harassers.